short- like my legs.

sometimes, i cant decide what is more/ most important to me

no, i will not eat your creepy version of protein.

After a long time of being insistent about my peculiar picky consumption of meat, I have given in.

My requirements were these:

I do not eat pork. Ill try any excuse. I am a jew. I AM A JEWWWW!!! [ok.not really a jew...]

I do. not eat. roast. beef.

or steak.

OR lamb. or any animal not meant to be eaten. such as; deer.

Here is where I lowered my standards

i still don’t eat pork. However today I was too lazy to open up a new package of lunch meat. So I choked down some ham. This is how bad my laziness has become? I am never eating pig meat again. Stop trying to trick me. I will bend my rules. Because im lazy. Like how ive been eating corndogs…. We wont even get into that. There is so so so many excuses. Hot dogs are gross.

b. i was really really hungry last week. Practically starving. Mom. Please stop making roast beef multiple times a month, let along multiple times a WEEK. But my poor stomach was much too weak to cook anything else. Even if it was just in the microwave. I was starving, remember?

Steak is only to be consumed in a situation such as the last nooooo moooreeee exxceeptionns.

d. Which leads to lamb. which will NEVER be excused. Who do you think I am. Im not going to eat an animal that is on the cover of a lisa frank folder. I learned better than that in elementary school, come on!

On the other hand, Glenn Beck is creepy.